Hello Elise McKenna,

Yes, love can last for a very long time. A bittersweet tale. There was no real conflict and only a tragedy. It was a little repetitive and yet managed to maintain my interest.

This could be great beginning for a feature for something bigger.

The use of POV works here as I was wondering why for the POV and is nicely answered.

For a long time, I was wondering how to write accents in a script and found your script to also be a learning tool as well.

In the end, love is eternal here.

Thanks to all who read and commented.  All feedback is greatly appreciated.

When I told Wifey that an OWC was coming up, she asked me if I could...and would write something without so much swearing, nudity, sex, and drugs.  I told her I'd try.  Actually, I was able to pull it off and she was impressed...not that really does anything for me.  HA!

I wanted to go completely outside the box here and write something that didn't scream, "Dreamscale wrote this!".  So, I came up with my concept, which is quite simply, "love" and how a love can endure over time.

I wasn't sure how things were going to turn out, so I toyed with a few different ideas, and finally settled on what we have here.  I had to cut about a page off to meet the damned 6 page limit (have I ever said how much I hate short page count maxes?).  But amazingly, after cutting down to under 6 pages, I was able to go back and add a few things in that I was hoping I'd be able to.

The repetition seems to be an issue for most here, and I apologize about that, but it was a conscious decision and a decision I'm sticking with.  These POV's are actually all Flashbacks, Sergei's memories, and they're all good memories...great memories...all of life with his true love, Shawna.  Some peeps mentioned I should add in some not so great memories, but that wasn't at all what I was going for.  As time goes by, we tend to be able to overlook the not so good times and focus on the good stuff...the moments that define us and bring us happiness.  Especially when we lose a loved one, and that's really what I wanted to show here.

When we jump to the present, which is actually in our future, I tried to gradually make it clear, by adding the "silver alloy air car" (which indeed is a shout out to RUSH and "Red Barchetta").  The title, "Somewhere in Time" is both an album by the legendary Iron Maiden and 1 of my personal favorite songs by the always underappreciated Savatage.  And really, what we have here are simple moments in time, going all the way back to 1954, when Shawna was 24.  The bikini, although invented long before, drew the world's attention in 1953, when Brigitte Bardot was photographed at Cannes, so having Shawna in her white bikini wasn't random - (in an earlier draft, we started in 1943, and she was in a one piece, and I just knew peeps would wonder why a 24 year old wouldn't be in a bikini).

Answers to a few questions...

Khamanna mentioned she missed "why the relatives needed that".  I'm not 100% sure what that means, but the only relatives mentioned are Sergei's family and that they are very wealthy and Oskar was strictly following their wishes.  Their wishes are what Sergei had laid out long before the accident.  He simply wanted to be with Shawna forever and whatever that took, that's what was supposed to be attempted no matter what the cost.  This was not stated anywhere in the script - I just hoped it would be understood and not even brought up.

A couple peeps didn't seem to understand what the $500 Million Euro bank transfer was all about or had to do with the script.  The technology involved to keep the brains "alive" and to be able to "see" one's memories was what was being purchased, and at $500 Million Euros, that's actually a steal, but (again, not mentioned in the script) Sergei's family wanted the world to know of this medical marvel and breakthrough, as the implications are unending and the money keeps everything going.

Some saw this as bittersweet or even sad and I definitely understand that, but my goal was simply to celebrate love and show the power of true love.  I found it touching and I hoped you all would as well.

Lots of fun was had, and although it took me literally hours to remember how to use my software, I have to admit I love to write and create.

Thanks for your input.

I enjoyed this one very much.  The reason I didn't review it during the challenge is that I wanted to divert attention away from the script I wrote (and reviewed).  Some folks, in researching who wrote what, simply look at all the reviews and assume that the writer would not review their own work.  I picked Jeff's to be my red herring in the mistaken belief that everyone things I'm a better writer than I actually am.  

Also, "Somewhere in Time" is one of my favorite movies.

And, I sent Jeff my comments upon submission.

- Don

Don, I love the misdirection here.  Very sneaky.  Sneaky is good.

I tried to be sneaky, too, when I threw out my guesses for who wrote what?  I had a lot of guesses, but I purposely didn't make a guess on Knotty Boy, hoping peeps would wonder if I wrote it, taking attention away from my actual entry.

Haha, I always know what you wrote, Jeff.

Interestingly this time Don's script also seemed like yours. But I recognized this one as yours too.

Quoted from Dreamscale I tried to be sneaky, too, when I threw out my guesses for who wrote what?  I had a lot of guesses, but I purposely didn't make a guess on Knotty Boy, hoping peeps would wonder if I wrote it, taking attention away from my actual entry.

That's funny. I did the same thing and had you down for Knotty Boy in my guesses!

Quoted from JEStaats That's funny. I did the same thing and had you down for Knotty Boy in my guesses!

Now, that is funny!  Good job!!

Bummed I didn't get to this one during the actual challenge, as I would have scored it well.

Aside from a few odd hiccups, the writing here is pretty tight! Flows well and pulls the reader to the next page, as it should.

Story-wise, I wasn't digging this schmaltzy love story... Until that dark twist hit. I wasn't expecting that! And you still managed to make that kinda sweet as well.

Great work here, dude. It's awesome to see you back in the saddle again!