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Search Results - Recent posts as of less than a minute ago
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Showing 1 - 30 (19599 results found)
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Middle Man Mick   (reply) Posted by: PKCardinal
Date Posted: 52 minutes ago

Quoted from ColinS
Thanks Don for posting - This is an updated draft of Middle Man Mick based on the really insightful feedback that I received on the original posting. Thanks Paul and D.A, I feel it's a much improved script now.


I'm looking forward to another read!
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Addiction: please review my logline   (reply) Posted by: LC
Date Posted: Today, 4:25am
I wouldn't get too riled up about it, Marty.

Colourful language can be a wonderful thing, great for dialogue which I'd personally save this phrase for. Researching and learning about language usage, colloquialisms, vernacular, slang idioms etc., should be a part of your writing tool-kit.

I agree it's not the most eloquent choice of words for a logline.

https://www.wordorigins.org/big-list-entries/piss-poor-pot-to-piss-in
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"Happy Hollow" logline   (reply) Posted by: MartyB
Date Posted: Today, 3:53am
I just realized the movie is called "Happy Hollow"

Happy? Its a woman with a deer head, its horror isnt it? Or is it happy and smiles, and fluffy bunnies?

Delete the word happy, and replace it with something thats not stupid.


Happy
Adjective▲
Opposite of experiencing a feeling of positivity, satisfaction, or enjoyment

melancholy miserable sad unhappy upset depressed troubled disappointed disturbed down melancholic morose negative sorrowful abject aggrieved anguished brokenhearted dark dejected depressive desolate despondent disconsolate discontent discontented disgruntled displeased distraught doleful dolorous downcast downhearted forlorn gloomy glum grave grieved heartbroken heartsi...

Click here to read more ...
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Addiction: please review my logline   (reply) Posted by: MartyB
Date Posted: Today, 2:12am
When he is left without a pot to piss in

Kelly, you should not be giving logline advice, considering you're unable to construct your own logline for your own script. that is disgusting language to convey to someone, especially a professional Hollywood Producer.

People are never going to improve if they keep receiving garbage, misleading advice.
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Halloween: A Twist in Reality   (reply) Posted by: Devonte Huntley
Date Posted: Yesterday, 11:32pm
An error in the script. Don accidentally replaced A Twist In Reality with the sequel script. This will hopefully be resolved too.
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Dark Art   (reply) Posted by: Busy Little Bee
Date Posted: Yesterday, 7:32pm
Hey Zack!

Because of the logline, I thought the Woman would struggle more. As far as I can tell, the first victim's blood, brains and hair mixing seems to be the only conflict because it ruined her shot somehow. But after she kills the second victim, I don't get a sense that she achieved that goal because it cuts to black, so I'm not exactly clear what isn't working for her.

BLB


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No Life Without You, Rosanna Dreamer - OWC   (reply) Posted by: LC
Date Posted: Yesterday, 6:29pm

Quoted from Abe from LA
...LC, I appreciate the praise and am looking forward to seeing Rosanna paired with Colin Sharp's review and poster. Heis the reason I revised the story. So I owe Colin a lot.

Everyone can read Colin's review here:
https://www.simplyscripts.com/

And Gary, good luck with this. A terrific script!
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New York State of Mind   (reply) Posted by: ColinS
Date Posted: Yesterday, 11:31am
I do have a feature script listed this week named Middle Man Mick. It's comedy/sci fi - If you get a chance to check it out, your feedback will always be appreicated even if it's hard as nails.

It being a comedy, I might be in trouble if you're in no mood for some laughs  
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Kinolime Make A Movie Screenplay Contest   (reply) Posted by: Snowman
Date Posted: Yesterday, 8:23am
They'll announce the top three in ten days I think.

I have very strong views on what a screenplay is, and while I know my screenplay can actually be called a screenplay, many can't, including some of those top ten.

With that said, I'm not going to make the top three, and the eventual winner, at this point will not be an actual screenplay. I hope they know they have a lot of rewriting to do.
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Find Me Woman   (reply) Posted by: Stoneyscripts
Date Posted: Yesterday, 4:19am
Yes this is a radio play also Michael, available in screenplay too.

You are correct about the mispelling of Ligtning. Lightening is when you make something lighter. Very well picked up and thank you. I will sort it.

Thanks for the read.
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The Valuation   (reply) Posted by: Stoneyscripts
Date Posted: Yesterday, 4:13am

Quoted from D.A.Banaszak
I have never read a radio play before. If I did, I thought it was a stage play.

You might have been tempted to write some visual description. If you were, you caught yourself because I didn't find anything like that.

This had a different ending than I expected. I had to read it again to make sure that there weren't any names switched someplace or that I misunderstood who was who. Nice ending.


The thing with radio is that you cannot see anything. it is a bit like being blind so your ears are your radar. This was my take on raio play anyhow. No visuals, just noises and voices.

I based this particu;lar script on a dark comedic series we have this side of the pond: INSIDE NO'9.

This...

Click here to read more ...
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Kinolime Make A Movie Screenplay Contest   (reply) Posted by: LC
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 11:52pm
Thanks for the link. I noticed Top 3 now for voting. Did you make that?
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Kinolime Make A Movie Screenplay Contest   (reply) Posted by: Snowman
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 11:06pm
Yes. This contest started months ago. I don't even remember where I found out about it. I just knew it was FREE (that's the only kind of contest I'd enter). 600 to 30 to 10. I can almost guarantee who the winner will be (it's not me). But, given the rules and regulations of the contest, it's almost a 99% guaranteed outcome.

The site address is http://www.kinolime.com
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Find Me Woman   (reply) Posted by: D.A.Banaszak
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 7:16pm
This doesn't have "Radio Play" on the cover sheet but The Valuation does. I am assuming that this is deliberate in that this could be either a radio play or a screenplay. "Radio play" is in the logline so I picked it up from there.

I'm not sure of the spelling of lightning in your opening action text. It could be a British thing but it's worth pointing out.

I like this version better than the last in that much of the crude activity has been removed. I thought the graphic indecency seemed unnecessary and it took away from the story. The re-worded punchline is much more tasteful and funnier. This is a nice improvement.
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The Valuation   (reply) Posted by: D.A.Banaszak
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 6:55pm
I have never read a radio play before. If I did, I thought it was a stage play.

I used to listen to a weekly radio play on weekends a long time ago so I compared this to those. It stacks up quite nicely. You might have been tempted to write some visual description. If you were, you caught yourself because I didn't find anything like that.

This had a different ending than I expected. I had to read it again to make sure that there weren't any names switched someplace or that I misunderstood who was who. Nice ending.
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Middle Man Mick   (reply) Posted by: ColinS
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 6:04pm
Thanks Don for posting - This is an updated draft of Middle Man Mick based on the really insightful feedback that I received on the original posting. Thanks Paul and D.A, I feel it's a much improved script now.
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Kinolime Make A Movie Screenplay Contest   (reply) Posted by: LC
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 5:50pm
So, this is closed for entries, correct?
Perhaps include a link for those interested.
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Kinolime Make A Movie Screenplay Contest Posted by: Snowman
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 4:36pm
This is what has been taking up so much of my time. Getting people to vote.

Round One had 600 screenplays, with people voting for their favorite script. Which basically means, get your friends to read your script and vote for it.

600 was whittled down to 30.

This Sunday was the last day for voting for the top ten. My screenplay "Speaking To the Dead" is #7 out of 10.
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Halls of Sorrow - A novel by Sean Elwood   (reply) Posted by: Zombie Sean
Date Posted: July 16th, 2024, 3:10pm
Hey P,

Thanks for telling me your experience with HALLS OF SORROW so far! This is really encouraging commentary. I'm happy you've read any of it at all so far, and what you have read, I'm glad you're enjoying it, and that it's an easy read. Good luck with the film shoot, I totally understand the complications of working with children and animals (namely children), as I have directed a shoot with two single-digit kids before. While THEY were easy to work with, it was still a challenge for sure.


Quoted from Grandma Bear
You told me it was a very depressing piece, but I didn't find it that way. I think it all depends on how you write the characters. I've read plenty of S. King novels, for example, that could be described as depressing, but they
...

Click here to read more ...
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Halloween: A Twist in Reality   (reply) Posted by: Devonte Huntley
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 10:34pm
NO STORY UPDATE:

Haha, I had to do that. Oh yes, I can finally say nothing else different is being done and that was getting annoying as it may have been for many of you tuning in the past month to see the constant changes this story has had and its various titles: The Legacy of Michael Myers, End Game, and now A Twist in Reality. The goal of this was to connect all the movies together, the first eight in the same continuity and RZ and Blumhouse as fictional works, the latter two things being scrapped by End Games.

SEQUEL UPDATE THOUGH:

Anyway, I'm in the process of writing a sequel to this story titled The Legacy of Michael Myers that's also set after Halloween Ends so it will be rat...

Click here to read more ...
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The worst script Iíve ever read.   (reply) Posted by: Snowman
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 9:53pm
I saw One Missed Call and I didn't like it. BUT, with that said, it was a "real" screenplay.

I've been a member of every peer review site since I think Triggerstreet or Greenlight. 99.99% of wanna-be screenwriters scripts are not real screenplays.

Most of the time the formatting is fine. But, they tell the story instead of showing the story. That's the hump most don't get over. So, it isn't far-fetched to think One Missed Call's writer had a contact and presented a decent script.  That's how it got made.

I watched Imaginary last night and I gave it one star, I gave One Missed Call, four. As much as I despised Imaginary, I still understand why it was made. It's an actual screenplay.
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Halls of Sorrow - A novel by Sean Elwood   (reply) Posted by: Grandma Bear
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 8:50pm
Sean, I've read past page 40. Not as much as I thought I would've at this point, but I have a house full of guests this summer, so I seem to have a hard time finding the time. I'm also prepping for a short film shoot with all the grandkids. You know what they say, DON'T USE KIDS OR PETS!!! In other words, this should be "fun".  

Anyway, I just wanted to say, in case someone else might want to read your novel, that it is a very easy read, and many things have intrigued me so far. I loved the house with the endless corridors and the suicide show. I was glued to the pages.

You told me it was a very depressing piece, but I didn't find it that way. I think it all depends on how you write the characters. I've r...

Click here to read more ...
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Shore Scripts | 2023 Fall Short Film Fund Posted by: ShoreScripts
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 7:11pm
$15,000 CASH PRODUCTION GRANT
THE 2024 FALL SEASON SHORT FILM FUND IS NOW OPEN!




Turn your calling card script into an attention-grabbing short film with our $15,000 cash production grant!

As a new writer, getting a script produced is a transformative career milestone that can lead to new opportunities and help you pitch your stories to producers, managers, and agents. Our Short Film Fund was established to commission production projects from emerging screenwriters and create another avenue for you to get your work seen by the industry.

Many of our previous 20 funded shor
...

Click here to read more ...
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Snooker Patrol   (reply) Posted by: Stoneyscripts
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 2:14pm
Sounds like youíve bought the T shirt Frank. Once again I love the parallel and glad you can see the funny side of things.
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The Valuation   (reply) Posted by: Stoneyscripts
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 2:10pm
Haha! Very funny Frank. Actually you were technically right with your first assumption that the phone is with the body. But as this is a radio play I couldnít show that. In screenplay that is the case.
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In Line   (reply) Posted by: frank j
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 1:14pm
I knew you were going somewhere with this. I liked it a lot. Good job with the statues and the new statues.

FJD
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Snooker Patrol   (reply) Posted by: frank j
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 1:01pm
What a parallel. My third wife left me for a traffic cop. But when she broke it off with him and we got back together, I left her for a British Airways flight attendant. Then the flight attendant left me. Reminds me of a Outer Limits show that I once sat through.

I've had the same experience back in the 70s. I saw the coppers on the corner and my foot suddenly hit the accelerator. I was in fear that the coppers were catching up to me with one of my ex-wives to arrest me. I've been running for years, I'll have to check to see what the statute of limitations is on that.

Carry on London,

FJD
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The Valuation   (reply) Posted by: frank j
Date Posted: July 15th, 2024, 12:09pm
It seems that every time I read one of your plays, I'm learning a new language.

I was hoping the Estate Agent was a copper. I didn't think about ringing the phone up like he did. But my first read I thought the phone was on the body in the ground ringing. Now I know it was in the house. Which made me think, I should always keep a cell phone on me. Just in case one of my ex-wives tries to bury me, so the coppers  could ring me up and recover my body.

Carry on London

FJD
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In Line Posted by: Don
Date Posted: July 14th, 2024, 9:59am
In Line by Steven Burton - Short, Sci Fi, Fantasy - A small diverse group waits in an urban bus depot line to experience role reversals when the bus arrives. 8 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

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Find Me Woman Posted by: Don
Date Posted: July 14th, 2024, 9:59am
Find Me Woman by John Stone - Short, Comedy, Radio Play - A comedic look at the Demon in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. 7 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

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Showing 1 - 30 (19599 results found)


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